How do you think about work?

Understanding your preference in work vs rest of your life has many benefits from:

⚘Understanding your style

⚘Understanding tradeoffs between life and work and taking control

⚘Creating Options (and removing blinders of problems)

Types of Flexstyles | Knowing Your Flexstyle: The Good and Bad Ways We Manage Relationships Between Work and Personal Life

https://www.informit.com/articles/article.aspx?p=1149382&seqNum=2

Chihuly glass sculptures are often seen as chandeliers in hotels and palatial homes.

Chihuly has now pivoted outdoors with the recent covid and partnered with prestigious gardens such as Gardens by the Bay to display these magnificient glass bursts of passion outdoors.

How about you? Are you pivoting to new partnerships? Rethinking your business model? Finding new outlets to display your talent while still retaining the essence of who you are?

Catch them in Singapore Gardens by the Bay from 1 May to 1 August 2021. See you there.

Yesterday my neighbours T&D gave me a box of Alphonso mangoes which they acquired from Little India- Tekka Market ahead of India’s lockdown. Good thinking.

I was the lucky beneficiary as they know I like the lovely fragrance of Alphonso. But I declined saying I will only take one or two as they spoil easily. Not to be deterred, the resourceful T gave me suggestions of pressing them to juice, making lassi – Indian yogurt drink.

I decided that I shall cut one immediately. To my surprise, I realised that the firm Alphonsoes are already ripe. Unlike Thai mangoes which are sour when firm, Alphonsoes are sweet when ripe.

I have been keeping them past their shelf life, no wonder the previous box had to be thrown away.

Recently, someone, on hearing that I was taking another certification reflected. You dont need another course. Its time to just do it.

Why do we hoard? We hoard to store for a rainy day. Some items are perishable, and cannot be hoarded. They spoil or past their prime. We say No to chocolate cake. I dont like chocolate, its too heaty for my body. Extra calories with no enjoyment. I say no to alcahol and cigarettes. I say no to risky behaviour that I will regret at leisure. I say no to losing my temper.

I say yes to …

What am I saying yes to…

Do it. As Nike yells!

Now! My self-coach is yelling.

Now.

Thank you T & D for your message in the mangoes!

#mango #now #TIME #procrastinate #validate

This video produced by the National Geographic shows two different basketball players reaction while blind-folded.

The first lady was an amateur and made to believe that she had good shots while blind-folded, while previously, she missed all 10 shots.

Second time around, when blind-fold was removed, she was able to get 4 out of 10 shots with positive encouragement.

The second guy was a keen basketball player, and able to get 9/10 shots in. While he was blind-folded, he could not get any shots in. When blind-fold was removed, and he played again, and crowd’s negative reinforcement made him miss his shots.

Wow.

What will you do differently today having watched that video?

Is there anyone you will affirm? How about start affirming yourself?

Bloom where you are planted, and other gardening myths.

Sun loving Vanda Ms Joaquim

Some orchids love shade, some like the Vanda Ms Joaquim love the sun. Sun and rain.

Are you sun loving or shade loving? Are you a houseplant or you grow better on turfs like the Japanese rose? Introvert vs Extrovert.

Knowing your personality tendencies is not an excuse for your behaviour but understanding how you tick and not try to be like someone else!

#orchids, #vanda #preference #personality #types #typology #Jung #introvert

Today, I read with great sadness of the passing of Prince Philip.

Not a British citizen, my source was the Wikipedia, instead of the BBC or the tabloids, which are more balanced accounts.

How could a man, used to commanding ships, known to drive his officers hard, accept being recognised mainly as a consort “amoeba”, supporter of his wife, ie working in her family business, as the royal family is known. His wife is the boss.

Yet, I am filled with admiration, that the most outstanding of all his duties, making speeches etc, the one I give him credit for was that of being a guide to his wife and his grandsons.

What his life taught me is, a title, being King, but a bad one is nothing to lust for. Being clear about your roles and not be offended by what tabloids claim, even untruthful comments that he interfered or gave people unwanted advice into their love lives. (He did not.)

Despite the hardships of his early life, how as a baby he was smuggled out of Greece in a fruitbox when his family was exiled due to the Greco-Turkish war. Being seperated from his family, (his mother was sent to an asylum), Prince Philip, by today’s definition, had a challenging childhood. Yet, I’m surprised at how he managed his “gremlins/shadows” rather than “meltdowns”. Perhaps it also speaks of the tolerance of Queen Elizabeth and her clear sense of duty.

He had a clear soldier’s mission. I surprised myself today by my admission that I would put Queen Elizabeth and the late Prince Philip in my list of heroes.

Steadfastness is a virtue I intend to cultivate. Carve your own role.

What’s a virtue you have, despite challenges?

I have been told that visualisation and relaxing is very important. To encourage more coaches and group facilitators to try, Ive posted my script here. If you can attribute my post as a source, feel free to use it. Share your experience in comments below. My inspiration was the book of Ezkiel 47.

Start to feel comfortable. Sit comfortably. Take a nice breath in, and as you exhale, feel the muscles on your face and jaw relax. Now let your breadth take you down to your legs, feet and toes. Check that there is nothing blocking, in front of you.

Picture yourself in a peaceful park. It can be somewhere you’ve been before or from your imagination. Picture yourself there. You feel the gentle sunshine on your face. You feel the calm of the space around you. You hear gentle running water. As you do so, you come to a river, with running fresh water. Its a beautiful crystal clear river.

(i) Ankle deep

You walk into the water. It is ankle deep. Feel the coolness of the water without getting wet. Refreshing. Now, take a deep breathe in and a deep breathe out. You feel the sunshine gently caressing your face, the wind enveloping you, a feeling of warmth/ kisses from the gentle sun. Calm space, gentle running water.

Something catches your toes. It is a pebble, it is smooth and oval shaped. The pebble represent stress or worry in your life. You place the stone in your hands and throw it back into the water. Notice how the pebble hits the water and creates a ripple effect. You let it go, and notice how the ripples become still. How does it feels like? Take a deep breathe in and a deep breathe out. Let the pebble and stress drop to the bottom of the river. You start to explore, and find your place.

(ii) Waist Deep

Take another step deeper into the water, you feel your feet firmly on the ground. The water is waist deep. Movement is more difficult. Take a deep breathe in and a deep breathe out. You notice your thoughts. Others have returned to the ankle depth level where there is more fun and freedom. You notice leaves on the water. You pin your thoughts on the leaves let them go. There are beautiful fishes in the water. You want to discover more. You struggle. As you struggle, your muscles become stronger like a butterfly’s wings trying to emerge from the chrysalis.

(iii) Over your head

You’re now one step deeper in the river. The water is over your head. “The water here is beyond your control – it’s all
around you. You don’t fight against it – you calmly go with the flow. Breathe in breathe out. You let go of the firm ground. You notice your thoughts coming and letting go. Where is the river taking me? You notice the beautiful fruit trees on the riverbank. Fishes in the clean river, colored stones at the bottom. The old has gone, and the new has come.

You are letting the river carry you to a new place, going with the flow. Notice your thoughts and letting go. Breathe in and breathe out. Place your right hand on your belly, feel it rise and fall. Feel your feet on the ground, and being present at this moment. You have arrived. Prepare to open your eyes at the sound of the bell. Breathe in, breathe out.

Check in:

  1. How was the visualisation experience?
  2. What are your thoughts? What did you discover?
  3. One thing that’s better today?

NB: What is this river? This river can be lovingkindness, peace, hope for a better future. Often we’re full of stress, anxiety about what we cannot control, given the negative news around us. Just like we need to resist the temptation to rescue a butterfly trying to emerge from a chrysalis, as its muscles get stronger in the struggle.

Go slow.

#river #visualisation #Ezkiel47 #script #coach #coaching

I am appreciating how conversations can be nourishing. Often, I’m hopeful for solution focused futures. Having started my career in the diplomatic service and later venturing into headhunting and the human capital field, I’ve learnt that choice of words can make or break conversations.

Unhelpful comments, unintentional or otherwise, can prevent conversations from moving forward:

Accusing: “You need to ask yourself if the problem is you?….

Blaming: “I did this for you..” or “because I was helping you… [negative event happened]

Globalising: “You always …. ” “You never …”

Interrogating (tone): “Why did you do this?...”

Demeaning: “You are not joking...” “Good luck to you…”

Preaching: “You should…” “When I was your age….” “When I was [doing this job],...”

Threatening: “You better ...”

Judging: “You are not interested in making this work..” “You don’t care about...”

Excusing: “Dont worry, things will get better“.

Instigating: “He said you disrespected him

Tone of voice including sarcasm or anger. Non-verbal cues like rolling of eyes or twitching of mouth or sniggering, “humph”, interrupting the flow.

“What in the world were you thinking of?”

Joanne Koo

Director, Centre for Solution Focused Futures

To nourish dreams for a sustainable future